


Band Cuddle

by insideimasadrainbow



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: 5sos band/brothership, Cheesy, Gen, OT4, Sad Calum, borderline gay lowkey, dash of Malum, hint of Cake, slight Cashton, smh, they comfort him, tried to write a smut and this happens instead
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-03
Updated: 2015-12-03
Packaged: 2018-05-04 17:33:38
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,876
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5342564
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/insideimasadrainbow/pseuds/insideimasadrainbow
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Calum can no longer ignore what's being said about him on the media and breaks down.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Band Cuddle

**Author's Note:**

> God, I hate my summaries. >:(
> 
> This is half based off a prompt I saw on Tumblr and half based on Calum's deleted tweet. As sad as that was to read, I honestly do not blame him. Hopefully everything is better now for him though, the sweet little thing. I'm pretty sure the rest of the guys talked with him, but this is my make believe version on how it went, and I mean no harm by it. So don't kill me please. The prompt is the first line from one of the awesome oh so helpful prompt blogs.

His mask was melting. After all the hard work of keeping it clean of cracks and probing dents, it was finally getting torn down. Calum had his tear streak face between his raised knees on the hotel bed. Ashton's snores filled the room along with a soft sniffle from the bassist. It was 2 in the morning and Calum decided to go on Twitter out of boredom. Now he wishes he'd just stuck with being bored; it was better than the God awful tweets being said about him. Fuck, anything was better than these comments. Honestly, he should of known not to go on here because this had been going on for awhile now. All of the hate he's been receiving started up awhile ago. It was nothing drastic compared to now which is why he removes himself from the media from time to time. Calum has to constantly ground himself when he's off social media, otherwise his thoughts would kill him. So during his absense gap from his social sites, Calum would go do ordinary life things like grocery shop, hit the a gym, or go to the bank just because he could. He would take long walks and stumble upon a coffee shop or bookstore, and allowed himself to unwind there. But there was so much he could take, and the mask he's had on for this long was starting to crumble. How could he keep smiling when people thought he was ugly? How could he go out with his band mates when others tell him he just holds them back? How could he speak without his voice giving himself away in interviews when the camera's on him, and he wants to hide away because he can feel the judging eyes of those watching? He had forced himself at first and brushed off his band mates's concern for him once they found out about the tweets. He forced himself to keep smiling and joking like the words didn't pierce into his skin and molded into his bones. He forced his mask to be stronger, thicker, unpenetratable, and to not allow the hate to drag him into the black hole of depression. Honestly, he's tried so hard and is pretty proud of himself that he's lasted this long but after reading this new tweet, Calum had no more strength left to keep his mask in place.

_ash'sdrumstick tweeted: tbh I feel bad 4 the other members having 2 drag whats his face with them all the time. I don't understand bcuz hes not talented like them, he cant sing, he can't play right, he cant do anything 4 them so its kind of like y is he there??? ??_

_ash'sdrumstick tweeted: He's a waste of space and their time, they literally have so much potential and could be so far rn if it werent for the asian like fr... plus he never looks happy which makes my babies look bad gawd_

That's what the tweet had to say about him. And that's why Calum's phone was turned off with a black screen beside him on the mattress as he sat there no longer capable of falling asleep. That's why the tears had suddenly broke free, carrying out all the harsh and negative comments he's been getting hit with for the past few months now. But if Calum were to be completely honest, he'd say he's the one in the group who received the most hate ever since the beginning. It just so happened to be now that he was affected by it all. Red stained mocha eyes blinked sluggishly against cotton pants and the tear hanging off the dark lashes seeped into the cloth. Calum wiped his face across his thigh and sniffed. The words swirled around in his head, circling over and over like a predator, and slowly numbing his mind with 'What ifs'. Those were dangerous and Calum tried to shake them off but they kept crawling back like demons.

What if he really did drag the band down?

What if he really caused problems for all of them?

What if he made them look bad?

Calum hissed and clutched his head as if physically trying to yank those thoughts out of his head. He couldn't submit to the negativity, he could let it consume. But more importantly, he shouldn't believe a word said about him. He knew the truth. Michael, Luke, and Ashton knew the truth. Only they knew how it was in their little tight circle. Then again, what if they-

Calum ripped off his covers so violently that he cut off his wandering thought he refused to finish. He stumbled a few steps in the dark until he reached Ashton's bed and pulled back the covers. He climbed in quietly and as soon as he was pressed against his sleeping band mate, Calum's foggy mind cleared. It was like Ashton removed his dark thoughts and became a solid, warm reminder of just who Calum was beginning to doubt. Ashton was a piece of home, something that only he, Luke, and Michael could understand. No matter what others said of him about holding his band back, even though it hurt him deep, Calum knew better than to believe the false accusations. 

The dark haired bassist snuggled further against Ashton's chest and brought one arm to drape around the sleeping drummer's neck which made him stir. Calum pushed his face into Ashton's warm neck and let out a soft sigh, his warm breath tickling the exposed pale skin and effectively wake Ashton up completely. "Nnnn wha- who- Cal?" Ashton blinked sleepily, his voice deep and rumbling in his chest. He tried to pull away in his hazy state but was immobile from the arm laced around his neck. Calum stuck to Ash like glue shaking his head.

"Don't." Calum mumbled and Ashton scrunched his face up as Calum's hair tickled his skin and turned his head slightly away. 

"What are you doing in my bed?" the drummer asked and tried to pull away once more. But the younger boy was ademant of staying put. "What's the matter with you?" 

Calum let out a residue shudder in answer before wiping his face against Ashton's neck. "I'm sad." he admitted softly in a slightly cracked voice. Ashton immediately picked on how something was off with Calum's voice and grew concerned.

"Did you have a bad dream again?" the older band member asked and finally put his arms around Calum. He tried his best to comfort any of them when they were sad. He felt that since he was the oldest, he had to take care of them to the best of his ability and tried to play the nurturing role when needed. Calum felt a new batch of tears form up when Ashton started to rub his back in a soothing circle motion. He wished it was a bad dream, but unfortunately it was reality.  
So he shook his head no and sniffled. Ashton froze when he felt a wetness against his skin. Was Calum crying? Ashton forced the younger boy back who whined which he ignored and reached over Calum to turn the light on. Calum ducked his head to shy away from the small amount yet very bright life that now filled the room, but Ashton tipped his face right back up and frowned. Yes, Calum was crying and from the looks of his puffy eyes, it looked like he'd been crying before. Out of all of them, it was Calum who rarely cried. It took a lot for the bassist to get to that point but once he did, it was a sign that something really really bad happened. 

Ashton went 100 fold into his protective father mode and gently wiped the falling tears off Calum's face while still wearing his frown. "Who do we need to kill?" Ashton asked seriously which made Calum smile watery. But Ashton could see that the smile didn't reach the younger boy's eyes. He cupped a damp cheek and stroked his thumb across it gingerly. "Tell me what's wrong Calum." he ordered softly and watched Calum's face falter before falling as more tears built up. He opened his mouth but only a hiccup came out. The dark haired bassist tugged his face away from Ashton's long fingers and thumb, and hid it behind his hands just in time as the tears let loose. 

Ashton hugged Calum closer to him and started shushing him quietly, soothingly. On the inside, however, Ashton was flipping out. There was only one other time he dealt with a very emotional Calum and that was on the second night they had been on their own in a new country for the first time ever. Michael had cried on the plane, Luke cried that night, and then Calum broke down completely the second day. Ashton tried his best to keep it together under a tight lid and focused on comforting his distraught band members, but it had been hard even for him. And the way Calum broke down, well, Ashton never wanted to see that again. It was like watching a baby bunny get ran over by a truck over and over but he couldn't do anything about it. And now it seemed like it was starting to happen again. Calum was letting out strangled gasps and his voice hitched brokenly while those damn tears kept coming, sliding out from underneath the palm of his hands.

"Oh, Calum..." Ashton murmured sadly, feeling his own eyes beginning to prickle. "Come here," Ashton carefully pulled the both of them up and sank back against the pillows and head board while dragging Calum between his legs, and allowed the bassist to fall against his chest. Ashton closed his arms around the younger boy and rested his cheek on top of a fluffy dark head. "What can I do?" he asked softly over Calum's crying and sniffling, and felt his shirt bunch up near his stomach which was slightly exposed now by Calum's clenched fingers. But he didn't mind. However, when the door connecting to the shared suite with theirs opened with a bang, Ashton wasn't too fond of that, especially when Calum jumped in the safety circle of his arms.

Ashton saw the other suite had lights on but the door quickly shut after Michael and Luke who looked pissed and upset respectively. "Fucking jack asshole bastard cunts!" Michael all but growled as he stomped over to Ashton's bed. 

"Wha- language, Jesus Michael!" the drummer chastized indignantly, speaking over Calum's head. 

But Luke was arguing with Michael now. "Didn't I fucking tell you?" the blonde singer sounded more stress than angry though. "He saw them. Fuck, Calum." Luke climbed on the bed after Michael and together they crowded around a very confused Ashton and his raised legs with their bassist between them.

"What are you two talking about?" Ashton demanded and was takenaback by the furious glare Michael gave him. Unbeknownst to Ashton, the glare wasn't for him despite it being at him, and he soon figured that out after Michael thrusted his phone in his face and he read the tweets. Ashton's mind went blank with fury. 

"They're fucking idiots Calum, don't you dare listen to them!" Michael pressed his hand against Calum's shoulder as way of comfort while Luke crawled in the rest of the small space between Ashton's legs and slipped his long arms around Calum. 

The blonde could feel the gentle vibration of Calum's body from crying and felt a part of him inside chip painfully. If there was one thing Luke hated the most, it was when one of his band mates was upset and he could do nothing about it but give them hugs. And sometimes hugs aren't enough, and that's the cold truth. "They're wrong," he added loudly enough for his bassist to hear. "You know better than all of us that they are."

Ashton was still too pissed off to speak but he agreed with every word being said by his band mates. Michael moved next to him against the back board and lifted the blankets over his legs which were moved to mirror his. Ashton knew, he could feel what Michael wanted but now he didn't want to let go of Calum now that he knew why the younger boy was upset. But from the way Michael was startling to resemble a pissed off demon, Ashton quickly but gently maneuvered Calum into the guitarist's care but still remained close. Luke was forced to move back some during the switch but then he took over Calum's old spot, however he stayed upright on his knees even though he bent over and allowed his head to drop on Ashton's shoulder with his face looking at Michael and Calum. 

Michael had his arms wrapped tight around his best friend who was now making soft moaning sounds. "I took the liberty of looking through other tweets after reading that one and I found a shit more just like them. God Calum, you weren't fucking 'okay' when you said so. I'm pissed the fuck off right now." Michael seethed and felt Calum's hands on his sides squeeze. "You should have told us Calum! You don't go through that alone, ever!"

"That wasn't the only one?" Ashton demanded hotly and Luke picked his head up to allow the deep rumble inside of Ashton's throat die down before he settled back down. 

"No," he mumbled against the drummer's shoulder. "There was a lot more. They're disgusting and not fucking true- do you hear me Calum?" the blonde demanded at the dark fluffy head beside him. Luke's icy blue eyes flashed with emotions and he sat up, pushing himself out between Ashton's legs. It was killing him having to see Calum, strong, sassy Calum breaking down like this, and it made him absolutely furious that the cause of it all was from brainless idiots who knew NOTHING about them or Calum. Luke needed Calum to know how much he gave to the band and that without him, they'd be nothing. There'd be no point if there was no Calum. How could anyone not get this wrapped around their head? 

Michael wasn't pleased when Luke tugged Calum out from his arms; in fact, he was downright ready to punch his blonde singer. But Michael restrained himself knowing Luke was just as angry as him and had every right to comfort Calum. However, instead of mirroring the two oldest and have Calum settle against his chest, Luke wiggled his way down on the mattress after he got under the covers and pulled the slightly older teen down with him. It was then the blonde pressed Calum into his chest, his long arms closing around the bassist. Michael and Ashton followed suit, Michael throwing his arm around Calum and Luke, and Ashton draping his arm over Luke and Calum. The four of them snuggled close, their limbs and bodies tangling together. 

Their fierce words and warm arms calmed Calum down. Eventually the tears stopped, followed by the sobbing and moaning sounds, and then it was turned down into sniffles. But even those stopped after some time and Calum finally quieted down. His eyes were too puffy to keep open, his nose was so clogged up he had to breath noisily through his mouth, and his face felt like a swollen marshmallow, but he felt better. A lot better, actually. The band's presence soothed him. Luke's firm, rising chest full of breaths soothed him. Michael being a solid wall behind him soothed him. The way Ashton managed to reach his head and card his fingers into his hair soothed him. With them surrounding him like this, in this safe bubble where no negativity could get in right now, made Calum feel light. Lighter than he had in months. Holding everything inside by himself could have very well been a major issue in all of this. There were times even where he took a chance of venting on twitter but it only made matters worse. 

"I'm sorry." Calum finally croaked out. He moved his face and his nose brushed against Luke's collarbone.

"Don't fucking apologize." Michael said at the same time Luke uttered in surprise, "For what?" and Ashton saying, "You've got nothing to be sorry for." it made him crack a smile at his band mates before explaining.

"I should have told you guys that it was bothering me. B-but I thought I could handle it, you know? I did for awhile but it was like... it was like they were walking on thin ice and it kept cracking and cracking until it finally caved in." Calum said quietly in a thick voice, using his hands to express what he wanted to get across. He stopped moving them though because they kept brushing Luke's stomach and curled them against his chest. "I couldn't keep taking it.." one last stray tear fell down his cold cheeks but then warm hands cupped his face and brought it up where Calum met deep blue eyes. They disappeared out of view after Calum closed his when Luke brushed the tear away.

"Calum, I can't- words aren't enough to tell you how much we fucking love and need you. Not for the band's sake but for our own, like personally," Ashton's strong voice came from behind Luke. "We've been a package deal for so long now, I can't- I fucking won't think about how it would ever be without you. Without any of you for that matter."

"Aww," Michael cooed, his hot breath tickling the back of Calum's neck. "He does love us after all." 

Ashton rolled his eyes and snuggled against Luke. "Of course I do you idiot."

Michael snorted and Calum opened his eyes with a smile at hearing the two oldest members. However his attention was pulled back to Luke's eyes which were still piercing down at him. "Ash is right though, Calum," Michael spoke from behind him. Calum lowered his eyes down to Luke's chest and grew still to listen to the guitarist. "We already know there are assholes out there. We've all been through it. And I know you've gotten the brunt of it though I don't fucking understand why, but don't you dare go believing them. They don't know what they're fucking talking about. No one knows how we are but us, and that's what makes us special. I love you so fucking much and nothing changes that."

Calum smiled and shuffled around to face Michael so he could throw his arms around his neck. "I love you too Mikey." he responded, the tone of his voice the lightest it's been since forever. "I love all of you. Seriously. I don't know what I'd do without you guys but I don't want to even think about that. You make everything better."

"Aww," Ashton emitted while Michael and Calum giggled. "When did we become such saps?" the drummer wondered before poking the blonde's side he was spooning. "It's your turn though." he informed Luke who glanced behind him. 

"Calum knows who I feel about him." the singer stated but Ashton was not satisfied if that cross look shadowing his face said otherwise. Luke turned back to face the bassist who had also turned back around, his mocha eyes puffy but no longer holding deep sadness. Luke felt the strong urge to protect the dark haired boy. Not in the way like he was a superhero of any sorts but in the way of showing and expressing ways on how much Calum meant to him. And to make sure Calum would never have to go through this bull shit it again, because now, they all have the bond money at standby if they were to take drastic measures. Not only that, but to constantly remind Calum how much Luke needed him. Life without Calum is a terrifying thought and Luke needs him to be aware of how strongly he feels of that. So the blonde says this as he keeps his eyes locked on those mocha ones. God, they're so puffy. Luke gently touched underneath one causing Calum to close it on instinct. "You're my first love." the blonde wrapped up in a quiet voice and a goofy grin. 

The bassist smacked Luke in the chest before diving into it laughing. "Oh my god." Ashton shook his head while Michael's eyes brows were raised.

"I thought I was Calum's first love?" he questioned before poking Calum in the back. "Excuse me?" 

"Uh-" Calum pulled his face away from Luke's chest but Luke dragged him back, a firm arm wrapped around his waist.

"Well, you thought wrong," the blonde replied matter-of-factly. 

"You tell 'em honeypie." Calum giggled and Michael gasped indignantly.

"Excuse ME? That's it, we're over. Ashton, get over here."

"No way Clifford."

Luke had joined Calum in his giggly fest and they both ducked down when Michael climbed over them with a mission. They heard Ashton laughed and saying 'Michael, no!' over and over before a thud sound filled the room. The two youngest members looked over the edge of the bed and saw, underneath the small glow of light, Ashton and Michael on the ground in a tangled him. Well, now that they got a closer look, it was more like Michael straddling Ashton and Ashton trying to push him off.

"My heart is fucking broken Irwin and your're supposed to make me feel better, not feel worse." Michael huffed. 

"I'm sorry Mikey." Calum apologized but Michael looked the other way in mock puzzlement.

"Oh? Did I hear something just now?" he cupped a hand over his ear and tipped his head up. The bassist slid down on the floor with the other two and glomped Michael, promptly sending them flying towards the foot of each bed. Ashton was set free and now on his knees ready to stand up but a weight fell on his back which made him belly flop into the ground with a surprised grunt.

"You love me." Calum told Michael from his perch on top of him.

Michael sighed, resigned. "Yeah, I do." he chuckled when Calum fell on him flat and wrapped his arms around the younger boy. 

"You move on quick." came Ashton's bitter comment from underneath Luke's body.

Michael pointed an accusing finger in the drummer's general direction. "YOU rejected me asshole. What, you thought I would wait for you forever?" 

"I'm worth it." Ashton answered making the rest of them laugh. He smiled, relieved that everything was going back to normal quickly. It was about time, he thought. Speaking of time, it was late now so Ashton nudged Luke off him before getting to his feet. "Bed time kiddos." he announced before slipping back in his bed. It didn't surprise him when the boys followed him and soon they were all tangled up with each other back in their previous positions. 

"Band cuddles." Calum yawned out tiredly after a few minutes when Ashton had turned off the light. 

"Calum cuddles." Luke responded and tried to tug Calum closer to him but Michael wouldn't allow it.

"My Calum." he mumbled warningly and Ashton rolled his eyes sleepily.

"Go to sleep." 


End file.
